Mindset: Do You Compare Yourself to Others?

Once upon a time, one of my Platinum clients came to her coaching session feeling very unsure of herself, and frustrated. “I’ve started creating my Signature System, but then I get stuck when I look at what everyone else is offering.  It seems what they have is so much better.  Help!”

When I heard her say this to me, the problem was clear.  She was suffering from the “I’m not good enough” trap.  By comparing herself to other people, she was doing what most of us do: ending up short in comparison, and losing self-confidence.  My client is definitely not alone with this problem.

The problem is when you compare yourself to others, you take YOU and your special and unique talents and gifts out of the equation to be successful. 

This cripples your business’s growth, because when you compare, you inevitably fall short in comparison.  This is too bad, because doing this is a way women “take themselves out of the game” and don’t take the actions they need to grow their business.

Here are 3 tips to help you curb the urge to fall into the “I’m not good enough trap”:

1. Get a sense of your own value

You are unique in your knowledge, life experiences, talents, and special gifts.  There is no one else like you on the planet.  Get in touch with this so you gain a sense of your own value, what you have to offer others, and how you can uniquely help them.

Action Idea: Take out a sheet or paper and make a list of everything that contributes to the value of your work, including degrees, awards, trainings, natural skills and talents, people you’ve helped and specific results they’ve achieved, what others value about you, and what you value about yourself!

2. Create a continuous self-improvement plan

Ongoing expansion of your knowledge and personal mastery of key skills in your business is crucial to its growth and success.  Your current skill level and beliefs are reflected daily in the results you get in your business.  What’s your business reflecting back to you?

Being in business is not easy for most women entrepreneurs, because the fact is our potential clients have many choices when they want to work with someone get the help they’re seeking.  Why should they choose you?

Get in touch with the fact that part of their choice is determined by your special skills, life experiences, and talents you possess, as well as what you are learning NOW.  Keep your knowledge base up-to-date, and constantly be learning and growing to build your expertise and value in your clients’ eyes.

Action Idea: Meet with a mentor regularly, someone who will challenge you, stretch you, so you continue to grow and evolve.  Become part of a master mind group of like-minded entrepreneurs, lead be a leader who has successfully navigated the path and has ‘reached the other side.’  Attend professional development conferences, seminars, and workshops to increase your knowledge base and keep current.

3. Up-level your internal self-talk

Pay close attention to what you tell yourself, because what you say becomes your reality.  Notice what key ideas, phrases, thoughts, or beliefs keep spinning ‘round and round’ in your brain, disempowering you.  Make a choice of one idea or thought or belief to shift to something that supports you.

Action Idea: For the next 1 to 3 days. Jot down any disempowering beliefs that keep coming up for you.  Make a choice to stop these thoughts in their tracks, and adopt positive beliefs, instead.

Stop comparing yourself to others and get in touch with the TRUE VALUE of YOU.

You are special, unique, and to be successful, your business has to be a reflection of YOU.  Not someone else.  Put YOU in the center of your business, and create programs that project your expertise, what you know, and who you want to serve.  This will create ease in your business, because you will stop struggling ‘against’ yourself.

So, what happened with my client? She became aware she had a pattern of negative self talk and beliefs, and consciously chose to stop talking to herself in a self-defeating way. 

She also realized she had to focus on herself, and her business, and not other people.  She stopped struggling, and creating her programs got much easier once she stopped directing her energy outward toward comparing herself to others!

Want to learn strategies you can use to create a self-empowering mindset to support your success?  It’s no coincidence that once I started paying attention to my mindset (about 10 minutes every day), I created a 6-figure business working only about 10 to 12 hours per week.  I’m now sharing my secrets in a complimentary 6-Figure Mindset Secrets Breakthrough Session.  I’m only offering 5 spots.  To reserve your spot contact me at (847) 989-0513.

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